They Too Are Children Of God
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight oh Lord our rock and our redeemer.
You may have noticed there’s been a lot of chatter lately on the news, on social media, and plenty of other places about a certain topic. I’m talking about parenting and youth sports. Now many of you know that I have three children. One of them, my daughter, is wrapping up her season cheering for basketball. As a result I’ve had the distinct pleasure of observing some interesting behavior.
“We are competitors, not enemies”… from Instagram account of my kids school President. I fall into an aggressive line of thinking way too often during kids sports season. The heat of passion, of competition, I often just love it. Who doesn’t love being the best?!
Now despite this being roughly year seven of her cheering for basketball I still don’t understand the rules which I honestly see as a blessing. Unlike in football, which I do understand, if something seems to go sideways on the basketball court I am not immediately up in arms. It’s a luxury, if I’m honest, because I naturally lean towards the hot-tempered reactions when watching football- just ask my kids who really hate to watch it with me.
As a result when these parents have outsized reactions I’m generally looking around trying to figure out what is going on, and because of that I tend to take in a lot of the parents behaviors. And, it’s frankly just sad. The general result is that I in my mind end up with a picture of who these parents are at those schools in their worst moments. I catch myself making broad generalizations of these people who I don’t know- and if I do have a friend at one of those schools then I tend to not loop them into those generalizations. Because I know them.
Which brings me to Corinthians from today: “For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ.” Oh boy. And “the members of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and those members of the body that we think less honorable we clothe with greater honor, and our less respectable members are treated with greater respect; whereas our more respectable members do not need this. But God has so arranged the body, giving the greater honor to the inferior member, that there may be no dissension within the body, but the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together with it; if one member is honored, all rejoice together with it.” It’s really kind of amazing how the Holy Spirit works to have this lectionary reading at this moment, the day after another parent was screaming “you suck” to my daughter and her fellow cheerleaders.
It’s really not convenient to have to remember that that man- who was yelling at my child- is also a child of God.
Now, this may seem like it’s a hard segue but I promise it’s not. I’m not sure if you’ve noticed it but we Episcopalians are in the news right now…
Bishop Mariann Budde gave a sermon that was directed to those in power in our country. And it’s made a lot of people upset. The thing is, the same mercy that Bishop Budde calls for is the very same mercy that we are called upon to give to all of us- even President Trump. Even to the man who yelled “you suck” at teenagers, including my own 15 year old daughter.
Bishop Wright once said that being of this faith means to have to get messy- to get down in the dirt and the mud just as John the Baptist did.
To further paraphrase Bishop Wright- we Episcopalians, many of us have been raised oh so right knowing the perfect table manners, attending cotillion classes, and never ever to discuss politics or religion. But Jesus was political, he was religious, and he called upon those who were raised right – the Pharisees- to do more.
It’s like Letter from the Birmingham Jail- I’ll never forget the moment I read it and realized that I was the person that Dr. King warned about. I was the silent moderate who was content to stand by the sidelines when my brothers and sisters were oppressed.
Now of course the question is- who is actually being oppressed? I think each of us at different times have thought it was us. And I’m not going to make an argument one way or the other because I’d like to think that your heart can lead you there. But if you are in a place of comfort Jesus is clear- we are to do for others. We are to do the same for the least of us that we would do for ourselves. Because as is said in our readings- we are all one body in Christ.
The tricky thing about doing church the right way is that we’re going to bring in people who don’t look or act like us. I mean that’s part of what we want to do here right? We want to fill these pews? Do we really care if it’s someone who looks like us- if it’s someone who is trans? Who’s gay? If they’re Republican or Democrat or – gasp – Baptist?
We are here to build community and I have to be honest the more I have leaned into that the happier I have been. I spent a good bit of time from 2019-2021 just angry. Speaking up for my friends, speaking up for those who have been historically oppressed. And I’ll be honest a lot of that also comes from the pain of discovering more about my ancestry. Both those who were indentured upon- and those who used the owning of formerly enslaved persons to get ahead. The easy excuse of everyone is doing it prevailing. I know my actions would horrify my ancestors.
But I can’t say I won hearts and minds. No one who disagreed with me was in a place to listen. We don’t listen to each other anymore. No one does. I mean, we all got so focused on Bishop Budde speaking truth directly to the power in front of her that we forgot she was begging for mercy and stating that it is for all of us. And for me, I think the best way to lead is to invite people. Even someone who didn’t vote like me. Even President Trump. And frankly, even the man who screamed at my daughter.
There’s this amazing artist who does this series of prints called The Footwashing Series. She shows all kinds of people who are normally ostracized having their feet washed. And on social media she shows specifically Presidents Trump and Biden in the same slide show together. We are all called to wash the feet of others. There is not a person Jesus would not have washed their feet.
I feel I can almost promise that every last person in here has someone they love in their lives who they would, if they didn’t know them, be inclined to tear them apart in a social media thread. Or at least, think less of them. And that could be someone who could sit here- who could be our neighbor. Our friend.
The righteous anger that I had did not help me to carry my message- all it did, truly in the end was to fill me with poison and leave me in a place with no hope. Bishop Budde’s message is for us all. We get so caught up in the politics that others have enveloped around the message that we miss that part.
You may say that wasn’t the moment but my question to you is when? If not then – then when? If not her then who? The church teaches us that we are to cast out fear – because to fear means we can’t love. And frankly, so much of the rhetoric around us is simply from fear. If you didn’t fear someone else then wouldn’t it be easier to love them? And if you had love for them as a child of God then you wouldn’t fear them.
The inauguration is the perfect moment because we have this false notion of American exceptionalism- this shining city on a hill- that we are just fine going at life alone and without anyone else. We must realize that we are in community with one another. There’s a reason why the discernment process, which I wrapped up roughly a year ago, happens in community- because alone our own voices aren’t enough. It is only in community that we can come to a true consensus- in listening not just to others thoughts but even their perceptions of ourselves. I can hold myself as an example- I thought I was called to the Diaconate because I wanted to preach. BECAUSE I got so angry and fired up one day that I almost did it. And my discernment committee led me to licensed lay ministry. And that then led me to this right here. Preaching to each of you. This path was one that I did not see, but God knew what was before me. Without knowing it I was called to the place where my heart was pulling me.
And I have to think if people decide to leave the church over this one person and this one speech then I don’t think they really had community to begin with. Think about it- your church is the people you see. You talk to. Are you really going to leave people that you love over this? Would you leave them because you may not like what I’m saying here? I would hope not. You are the church, you, and we, are the body of Christ.
Maybe if that man screaming at my daughter knew her or knew me, he wouldn’t have been yelling at her. And that’s why when I realized what was going on, I approached him and introduced myself. Shook his hand. I watched his discomfort while I spoke to him. While I may have experienced some schadenfreude, I am human after all. I didn’t do it just for him but for me- and also for my daughter, who was watching me the whole time. I would want someone else to do it for me, if they made an assumption about me based on where my kids go to school, or what I wear, how much money I make or even who I voted for. And, as for me, I’m going to pray and do my best to look at everyone around me- to know that they too are children of God.
https://www.episcopalchurch.org/lectionary/epiphany-3c
