I Took a Wrong Turn

The other day was one of those roller coaster days, a few highs and a few lows- with one significant event.

I was running late for a meeting with my new interns for my business (and y’all- I’ve got a great group of girls) because I received a series of text messages that hurt me to my core.

“Sometimes there are people that simply don’t have a godly conscious”.

Wow. Followed with:

“You’re an unappreciative whore” “U don’t have a house! U don’t have anything but thousand in debt and reputation as the slut of macon that is crazy as bat shit!!!!” “U are a pitiful excuse for a mother!” “U stupid fucking whore!!!!” “Karma is coming.” ” U can’t purposely be mean and not know god will have his vengeance in his time.”

 

It’s not the first time I’ve been called these names by this particular person. But it hurts nonetheless. Even so, I was in a funk and running late to my meeting. I even passed the turn to get to Poplar and decided to turn around in an unusual spot in the Roly Poly parking lot. When I did so, I spotted what appeared to be a homeless man pushing a cart. It was getting dark, and I couldn’t see well but I stopped- I remembered I had some cash.

I rolled down the window as he came slowly in my direction, rolled the window all the way down. “Excuse me, could you use five dollars?”

He came to me, surprised, and said ” I sure could!”

And so I handed it to him, and as I did so I reached for his hand. I remembered a sermon from church, what if God was homeless? And even if He wasn’t, this is a person, a human being, someone with a soul just like mine. “Why are you doing this?” He would ask.

I could hardly hold back my own tears, ” Well, I’m having a bad day, and I figured yours mine be worse than mine.” I just couldn’t come up with anything more profound than that.

He leaned over and did something I would have never allowed anyone to do under normal circumstances, and he kissed me on my forehead. ” Thank you!”

I would smile, and say ” God bless you,” and he would say the same. ” Do you have somewhere to stay?”

” Yes- I’m going to stay over here by the Medical Center.”

“Oh good- they can watch you there. You’ll be watched over.”

” But I sure could use a bath.” I didn’t know how to respond to that, I was more concerned that he had somewhere to be warm, or to at least be watched if not.

” Well, but you’ll be ok where you are, right?”

” Yes.”

And I remembered something else- from another story I had read once about the homeless, or maybe it was a sermon- that they want someone to know their names. “What’s your name?”

” Charles,” he would say, as he walked away.

” Hi Charles, I’m Molly.” And we waved.

I think it’s important to know that I never do anything like that, I’ll give money when approached but I’m ashamed to say it’s never been the other way around.

I took a wrong turn today, and have taken many throughout my life in fact. But I think sometimes the wrong turns bring us to exactly where we are supposed to be. Even the things that people say to us can move us to be where we are supposed to be, without even knowing it. There I was, nearly in tears over some words someone said to me- and there was Charles, who simply wanted a bath.

I took a wrong turn because I was distracted and hurt by some really ugly things that were said to me. But through those really ugly things, those hideous words, I think I found where I was supposed to be that night.

I wish I had a more profound conclusion than that, to be honest I wanted to go and find Charles again and check on him. I wanted also to talk to him, sometimes a stranger who doesn’t know us can comfort us more than those who do. Charles gave me what no one else could that day. I’m honored to know his name.

Sometimes even the strongest among us hurt, even when we put on a brave face and say we’re fine- we’re really not. I used to think it was a curse to have a fragile heart but now I know it’s a blessing. It doesn’t mean the ugly words hurt me any less but it does mean I can reach out and know what someone else is feeling- to connect with them when perhaps no one else can.

 

“For all have sinned and fall short the Glory of God”- Romans 3:23

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, I gain nothing.”- 1 Corinthians 13: 1-3

 

Love to all y’all,

 

Molly